On Saturday, my Hubby and I spent the evening with some very good friends. We ate dinner, had creamies, built a fire, laughed, talked, and conversed with multiple junior high and high school kids getting ready for the next week. They were talking about the things they had just bought for their new year at school and I couldn't help but feel a sadness.
I wish that I had mom to take me shopping still for new pairs of jeans, shirts, shoes, felt pens, books, binders, pens, and pencils. I miss the smell of the school the first day (at the beginning; by the end it just smells like sweaty boys). I miss the first day of practice after a full day of school. I miss the papers, the assignments, the new cute boy in English. The excitement of being older.
Now, I'm older. I have responsibilities. I'm pregnant. I can do whatever I want (in theory) when I want. It's just not what I imagined when I was younger. It's better in many ways, and I was seriously mistaken in others. It's nice to be older; I just wish I wouldn't have wished it away so fast and would have enjoyed the younger times a little bit more.