This weeks lesson at church was from the Teachings of the Presidents of the Church-Joseph Smith book. I have mixed emotions (like most topics for me) when Forgiveness comes up. Mostly because I have had to really focus on this for the last four years. (Something I never really struggled with before)
Anyway, the lesson started with our teacher admitting that she had forgotten that this was the third week in the month and so had not prepared anything. (I felt mostly sorry for her cause now she had to throw something together without any prep time. And that really sucks.) But she reads a story from the beginning of the chapter and then asks the standard questions of "why do we need to show forgiveness?" "How does this story help you forgive others?" etc. etc. (Really not as terrible of a lesson as I would have expected with no prep time)
The comments were all about how important forgiving others is and how it will eat at your soul if you hold onto this "poison." How wonderful it was that (after relaying a couple of stories from the NEWS) that people immediately forgave the person who injured/killed them or the ones they loved. And of course, 10-15 minutes were spent on road-rage.
Okay this is all wonderful. I know that it's important to forgive. I do. I know we need the reminder to forgive, but do we need to spend over 30 minutes reminding each other in as many different ways as we can possibly express ourselves? Let's talk about how hard it is to forgive. What made it hard? What are some ways to overcome the heartache? How much time it can take. How we need to give ourselves time. How we need to be patient and loving with ourselves as well as the other person.
Where is the separation between when you should immediately forgive and when you should lovingly bring to attention the wrong doings of someone else? You would NEVER just forgive your child for doing something without bringing to their attention and teaching them the fault they have committed. Why do we step on eggshells around other adults?
At what point did we decide it was offensive to tell another adult about a problem between you and them? Especially if they did not know they did it and it would effect others later on. (if not already) We turn away and make up excuses for why they might be doing something or devise in our own minds a justification.
We, as adults, are NOT to old to be corrected. I hope I am corrected by a loving heart. How will I ever learn to better understand others if I am not called out on things sometimes? I also hope I correct with a loving heart. I truely don't want to hurt anyones feelings permanently. I just pray that I can have compassion when teaching.
Just so none of you misunderstand, I would have brought these things up in Relief Society yesterday, but under the lack of preparation circumstance I didn't want to totally ambush a lesson/teacher that was already overly stressed. So, I'm bringing them up now. What do you think? How do you feel about Forgiveness? What has worked for you? What hasn't? What things mend your heart the best?